Monday, May 14, 2012

Top Ten Breeder Myths

I am aware this will make me look like I really hate kids and parents.  I really don't.  And yet these things are all still true.

10. Displaying a Baby on Board sign will make people drive safer.
9. Your friends don't mind if you bring your kids to their wedding reception.
8. Your friends don't mind if you bring your kids to dinner at their house.
7. Other restaurant patrons don't mind if your child is badly behaved because they understand you really need to get out of the house for a grown-up night out.
6. Breastfeeding in public sans blanket is a beautiful act to witness.
5. Your friends are interested in hearing about "the cutest thing" your child did this week.
4. Your childless/free co-workers feels no resentment when you leave early to pick up your kids.
3. Using your kid's picture as your Facebook profile picture is ironic and cute.
2. Your friends can't wait until you post your next ultrasound picture. 
1. A stroller gives you right of way.  Everywhere.

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